UGH!!!! So I wouldve been clean for 8 months the 15th if you’ve read my other blog you would know that already but like I was home alone and idk I injured again i’m stupid a failure everything I hate myself so much right now!!!! I can’t believe I gave into temptation I can’t tell anyone though because I know if I do and it gets back to my family everything will be taken away AGAIN and I won’t be able to talk to my boyfriend and my mom and step might make us break up…. Idk wat to do I’m sure they will find out sooner or later but I don’t want them to because il have to go through what I just did idk what to do!!!!!!!! I need advice!!!!
I understand that you’re really upset right now. We all do. Still, I know from experience that if you don’t communicate with your parents what’s going on effectively, you’ll end up in a position you do NOT want to be in.
Write down your goals. Sit down with a pen and paper and express what you want from say, the next six months. Do you want to stop your S.I.? Do you want to have a better relationship with your boyfriend? Do you want to communicate better with your parents? Do you want better grades? A clean room? To save money?
After you figure out what you really want to do, you can start to set up a step-by-step plan. If you want to stop S.I., you can say you’ll attend a meeting, see a counselor, keep a journal. If you really feel it’s urgent enough, you can voluntarily check yourself in to a place like S.A.F.E., where they offer the resources to help those in crisis 24/7.
If you write these things down, you’ll be able to more clearly express to your mom that you’re stuck, that you don’t know what to do. She can help you discuss your options, and you can say you just want to get control of your life again.
If you’re mature, you’ll come out from all of this stronger and more aware of what fuels your S.i. If you’re proactive and not reactive, it’s a lot easier to feel good about yourself.
Cheers,
Alex