Ok so I’m so stressed I don’t know what to do to it’s so horrible…. I want to SI so bad but I don’t want to at the same time….

I had a trigger today in class and I got so deffincive I almost cried to…. So there’s a guy at my table and the teacher was talking about getting a “high” without drugs and this guy goes so is that why people injury themselves (except he used a diff word) and I was like uh no it’s not you don’t know that 1st thing about it!!!! And we kinda got into an argument over it…. I HATE how people are so inconsiderate about people he wanted me to show proof to him that I SI and he was like yea my girlfriend did it once and the tone of his voice was like he didn’t care…. Which made me wonder if anyone cared and I went back into my depression mood I felt so alone and still kind of do…. And last night I was talking to a guy and I got even more depressed…. He called me trash and said I was no good and that I was a problem and all I ever do was cause problems…. I used to really like this guy alot it hurt so much…

I don’t know if I can handle this if literally everyone treats me like this I know I have problems but I don’t think I’m trash I know I’m a screw up though…. Do people really want me gone do they hate me that bad…. I’m just so confused and don know what to do anymore I’m starting to fall back into SI it will be 8 months the 15th and I don’t wanna mess that up I just need on advice please leave your thoughts good or bad just something please!!!!