Well my dad died 6 years ago on fathers day. After that my whole family has torn apart. I ALWAYS feel like it’s my fault that he is gone, everyone tries to tell me different but it doesn’t help. Just makes it worse. I wanted to end it at 8 ( when my dad died a week after my bday). I had to go to counciling over that. Needless to say that didn’t help either, it just made me keep everything to myself even more. At 12 I injured the 1st time… It got worse as the months went on. At 13 it became an addiction.
Then one afternoon I was helping my church out raising money to go on camps. An injury showed and my mom saw what I had done the day before. I got grounded and everything was taken away. My room got searched as well as my whole body. I haven’t been able to use sharp objects when I ate until here recently. My mom found out on febuary 15. I’ve been clean for almost 8 months. It’s a big deal for me but when I get my privalages I don’t know if I will be able to retain myself from injuring again.
It makes me feel worse when everyone (even my family) acts like I’m invisible. It’s been so hard not to get something and do it again. Oh and I’ve made a friend she does the same thing. But the problem is I haven’t found out a way to say something about it to her. I want to help her so badly because I’ve been down that path (still kinda am) but maybe not for the same reasons. Everyday in class it makes it hard on me too because I see her injuries and want to do it again but at the same time I want to help her. I’ve made a BIG desion! I want to give a speech in my class that obviously we give speeches on and that this friend is in. I want to give a speech on march 1st to help raise awareness about self injury. But I don’t know if I’m going to. I need someone to tell me something about this or anything that could help because i’m just so confused!!!!