Not joking.  I think I’m curse to my family… 

Every time I start to feel better and like I don’t need to punish myself through SI, my family goes weird! 

Like my mom keeps snapping at me, she told me to do whatever I want with the videos, then she tells me that I have to go through all the unmarked videos, THEN last night I made a comment about having to do that and she went crazy on me!  Saying that she thought I was just going to disregard them and dump them. I told her that was my plan until she told me I had to go through them.  She said that she never told me to do that! 

Or my sister…  I don’t know what I did but she keeps glaring at me or giving me that “Can’t you just leave me alone?” look.  She and I seem to be getting into a lot of fights….  And she seems to think she’s more upstanding then me or something, because sometimes I swear.  She’s making me feel small, and not just because she’s bigger then me.

I think my little brother is the most abusive in my toward me…  Funny huh?  I used to help keep him clean and help feed him now he seems determined to drive me into the dirt.  I don’t even say anything and I’ve ticked him off!  And when he’s ticked I suffer…  Does my mom care?  She blames me for ticking him off!  

Maybe I should never open my mouth…  Maybe I should just do my work and try not to breath near them.  Everything I do seems to offend them…  And when their offended I get hurt…  Mostly because I don’t like getting yelled at. 

I’m just a worthless curse to all those who come near me…