My best friend told me that I need to tell my mom that I SI. I don’t want to. My mom is very judgmental and doesn’t seem to understand anything. My family is very religious and does ‘everything’ by the bible. Anything that isn’t in the bible isn’t permitted in our house. So I don’t think that telling them would help me any.
When I went through the early depression phase my mom took my to the doctor, who wanted to put me in therapy, but my mom wouldn’t let her. I know my mom is on anti-depressants, but she won’t let me. I want someone to talk to, someone who will understand. But they all get taken away.
I had one best friend who I told everything, but my mom won’t let me hang out with her anymore. I’m not allowed to date. I’m not allowed to have any friends that my mom doesn’t know really, really well. And anyone that my mom approves of is not someone I can go trust my deepest secrets with.
My best friend told me that the only way to be free from SI is to tell my mom and get the help I need. She says that my mom will understand, even if I don’t think that she will. My moms an RN, so she’s watching me for signs of depression and suicide, she’s just too blind to see the marks on me. I really don’t think that my mom will understand, I don’t think that there is anyway I can get her to understand what I’m going through. If she can’t understand why I think guys are hot, she would never understand why I feel that I have to hurt myself to feel better.
Any advice? Should I tell my mom? How should I tell her? How much should I tell her? What are my options?