I went through a lot of stuff when I was young. It’s truly no wonder that I had problems with SI. I never truly had a father, I was molested as a child, and had scoliosis. That’s a curvature in the spine for those who didn’t know. I spent my childhood years being brave for my family, who was falling apart around me. I got older and chose a year out of my life to fall apart. That year I put on the act that I was okay with only noticable mood swings that might counteract my statement. My family must have been blind. I started wearing lond-sleeved shirts at all times. No shorts. I covered up the injuries. It ended up that everything I did revolved around hiding my secret. It became just one more thing to be upset over. I got help after that and my family supported me. After months of counseling I am proud to say I have been SI free for over 6 months. I now believe in every cell of my body that God is real and he saved me. If he was able to heal me he can heal you, too. Never give up hope. There’s always something better than injuring.
Love,
b
Your story is encouraging. I’m going through the same thing as you were, my life consists in trying to cover up my injuries, trying not to kill myself but its so hard. I don’t know what to do.
I think about the Bible verse, Matthew 11:28-30:
“Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”
But my heart feels too dark and burdened, i know i need to place my trust in Him alone and have hope in Him, but i can’t. what do i do?
“If he was able to heal me he can heal you, too. Never give up hope.” Thanks to God that He has healed you! And I want to say “thanks” to you for sharing this, that He has healed you and will heal any of us. So many people need to hear this right now. And hey, I won’t refrain from saying that it’s helped me, too — I have found hope, and I need to keep searching it out. Thank you for helping me seek it out. Thanks once again for speaking out, BTM — it’s refreshing, and yes, it does help bring hope of healing.
-badgermushroomskater
I am so glad that I have given someone hope through my story, BMS. Lost19, The advice I can give you is to completely hand over what’s upsetting you to God. He says he will not forsake you, and I promise he won’t. He will give you the kind of love that no one else can. All you have to do is soften your heart so God can work through you. Then, whenever your hurting, instead of running to the razor, run to him. I’m praying for you.
Love,
b