I haven’t S.I. since 9-7-08…  I’ve had times where I REALLY wanted to.  Then it all seemed fine, I didn’t want to hurt anymore…  But…  Now I want to again.  I…

I don’t know what’s made me want to S.I. again!  I’m not sure if it’s my brother always interupting me when I try to talk or his teasing or if…  If I’m just weak and my old habit is trying to come back…

I feel really stupid because…  I’m so close to going a year without this “cure” and now…  Now I want to throw it all away?  What’s wrong with me?