It has been forever since I have been on here. For a long time I was doing so well with SI and than I relapsed into my eating disorder big time. I am now in treatment for ED but with facing all of that, its so hard and the urges to SI are back full force and I just don’t know how much longer I can fight them. Its been a little less than a year since I last SI’d and I really don’t want to, plus at Renfrew (the ED place) I’ll get contracted for Self Harm and I already got contracted once. I am just tired of fighting it. I need an outlet and feel completely helpless! I can’t juggle all of this!
Talk, to someone who has experience in this area. Figure out the reasons you want to si and fix those reasons. SI is just a “crutch” or a “bandage” its not perminent and if the root problems are not fixed the feelings to si keep comming back.
You are not helpless, and you cannot make yourself powerless. You have choices, and no is one of them. SI is always going to be there, it will never go away. The thoughts will always remain. But it’s up to us to be strong and fight them. It may not seem that way, but it feels better to say no to SI than to give in.