Ok so on the way to drop off a friend, my mom said something that contradicted what she had said on the subject earlier completely. Confused, I called her out on it, only to have her start yelling at me in front of my friend for nothing, again. She always does it, but its getting really hard to just ignore it, and it made me realize something that scares me a lot. I really hate my mom. Not just ‘Im mad at her.’ Even when were not fighting, i still cant stand to be around her. I guess thats just the result of 15 years of her taking out all her problems on me, but i feel bad. Now I really want to SI, and im trying not to, but I know ill end up doing it anyways… i dunno, Im just really depressed recently, guess we all seem to be.