What is the payoff for not self-injuring? It’s not like I get a medal for it, or praise…I can’t even tell anyone, and if I could they would not be impressed that I’m not doing what any reasonable person wouldn’t even want to. I don’t feel better, the stupid Parent recordings are still telling me what a piece of trash I am, and it doesn’t even keep me from bingeing on junk food and gaining weight I can’t afford to. And not doing it doesn’t make the urge go away, either, it gets stronger the longer I resist. I get so tired of fighting the same battle, and knowing there is no such thing as winning the war: it will just go on forever.
i kno how u feel. and im not gonna tell u not to wry nd promise things will get better. they dnt for a long time. it sucks nd no matter how hard u try ull slip up then feel worse. but if u push urself u can stop. its horrible for a long time but trust me its worth it in the end. ill support u if u want it. i kno u need support nd praise. its wat keeps u going. even if its just frm a stanger. if u ask i will try to help. its a scary long grueling fite, but its totally worth it
I used to be like that. After all my relapses, I said to myself, when is this going to be over? You can win, but in order to win, you have to fight. And sometimes, you have to lose. The greatest victories in history, sprouted from defeat. We can not be defeated, we will not be defeated, and we WILL NOT give up. You have to fight to win. When you get an urge, call someone. Draw something. Write. Occupy your hands and your mind. Take them both to a different place, a good place. And always always always let someone know when you get an impulse. They can pull you through it, and provide a distraction. Last night, that happened to me, and my friend told me a funny story while I worked on some random artwork…and I was okay. You can do it. I know you can. FIGHT and WIN!
In order to gain something to have to give something away.
<3