Okay…well last night I went for a run, and I happened to quickly glance onto the street beside me. I saw something moving…it was an injured baby bird. He was flapping around and in pain, and I sprinted the one block back to my house to get him a box so I could hopefully keep him from being eaten alive by a cat. When I put him in the box with the help of a woman walking her dog, he writhed in pain and screeched. I felt so terrible. I put him in a box in my backyard, and then added a plastic box to keep him dry since it was during a thunderstorm. An hour later, I checked again and he was still breathing. I put some water and bread in the box, in case he came around…he would have needed to eat. Each time the box moved, he would flail and cry. I felt so terrible, it was just, horrid. The woman told me I was a good person for trying to save him, even if his death would be inevitable. I’d never seen so much suffering though…it really did change me. It showed me how I have to help those who suffer. My brother thought I was crazy, calling me a kook and a wierdo for bringing the bird home. But I said to him, “If you were laying in the street dying, and everyone who passed by ignored you, and someone came along to save your life, you’d think they were crazy too?” and he shut up. I said, that’s what I thought…you’re cruel. I was doing all I could to save this poor baby bird. He was so helpless, and I could do nothing but watch and wait=2 0and cry and pray for him to be saved. This morning, I went to check on him again before I went to school…he was dead. I buried him about 5 minutes ago, and it was such a tough thing for me to do. But I know that he’s okay now, and that in atleast trying to save him, he made a difference in my life and I was successful in atleast trying…that’s the thing I learned…that when others suffer, we have to put away our own suffering and help them. Always. Why? Because in the end, it will make us stronger, and maybe even ease our own pain a bit.
I am at 71 days today. From experience, reading someone else’s days of recovery and discovering that they are greater than yours can be disappointing. It seems so minimal sometimes. Just know though, that you can hang in there and achieve the same goals. We’re all on our own time, and we all don’t lead great lives of gold and glory sometimes, and its perfectly okay not to be perfectly okay. Just be proud of the days you’ve got, and use them as your weapon. Make them grow. Because as the days you have recovered grow, so does the person you are. You will grow. Each one of you.
<3 and hope always, rescue