Yesterday I si’d for the second time this week. I havent done it twice in a week since probobly october or november.  Im scared and lonely and i cant tell anyone because im afraid they’ll make me go back to the hospital. I want to get better. I really do. Nothing is going wrong in my life right now, not like this time last year, but despite that im terribly depressed. My grades are slipping, i cant sleep. I just dont know what to do because i cant tell anyone. everyone except my friend from S.A.F.E. thinks im better, she’s the only one that knows the truth but she lives in texas and i live in michigan. I dont know what i want or what i need.

Right now, i just want out.