Ok so this may make very little sense… I decided to tell my cousin that i Si, stupidly thinking she might help me discretely, but no, after me texting her twice she decides she cant cope with it and is worried i might go too far. So she decides to give me an ultimatium, either i tell my parents i Si by the end of tomorow, or she will. Hardly fair, for one i have no idea how to even start such a conversation with my parents and i dont really want to put them through that anyway, i was practicaly coping by myself anyway, i just wanted to tell someone that i wont have to see very often (she lives about 200 miles away) but i dont know how to convince her that i will be ok and my parents don’t need to know just yet, at least wait until my injuries look a bit better… any ideas?
I don’t really have any ideas on how to convince her that you will be okay since she obviously knows very little about the issue, the only thing I can think of is to get her to look at some resources online to prove that SI doesn’t mean you’re trying to kill yourself.
but on another note, if she is going to tell your parents maybe it would be better if you told them before she does, or even better idea, try to work with her? like um if you don’t want to tell them right now ask her to help you tell them, but talk to her and try to get her to understand it better before you do that…idk did that make sense? I hope it was somewhat useful..sorry I couldn’t be more helpful
Hi I’m Ari. As I can tell your plan to help relieve some of your emotions around your SI backfired. You also state you have until sometime tomorrow to make a decision whether your cousin spills the beans. You can turn around and start beefing up on SI knowledge. You are already blogging on a fantastic web site. I can imagine you empowering your self in this situation. As your cousin is set on letting your parents in on your SI behavior, you could let her “break the ice” initially and then be ready for a family conversation. Since I don’t know you or what type of family situation you live in, or even how severe your SI is, you could eloquently state you SI and are healing. Also you can ask your parents to respect your privacy, for now you just want to talk about your SI in a SAFE, sane matter.
I do not know your age or if you are in school. Do you think your SI has worsened over time? Could your SI be interpreted as suicidal? Do you think your SI has gone out of control or is beginning to? Might you look at one of SAFE’s programs? Put one of your parents in front of SAFE’s homepage if your conversation goes awry that way you can have a one on one with one parent instead two. By what you said this is going down tomorrow and the more prepared you are, the more likely the conversation will be productive. Also, you might get an opportunity to talk to a professional. I wish you luck.
ari.mastro@gmail.com
i dont have any ideas for you to convince her because i’ve tried convincing people and once you tell them, they act like they walk on glass around you. but maybe if you ask her to help you deal with it first instead of telling your parents? asking for help might prove to her that you want to get better; just tell her that you trust her and need her help. i hope this helps.
jen