I don’t know what would really become of me without the things that I do, or at least the thoughts of it.  I feel like if I didn’t, that I probably would’ve ended my life a long time ago.  I don’t know what to do.  How can I stop, but still be alive?  People tend to write this problem off as whatever, but they don’t know.  They don’t know what it feels like to reach a point in your life that you feel this is the only way to can get through it.  Not unless you’ve been there can you ever understand.