So I’ve gone a little bit without SI but tonight I just couldn’t handle it. Have you ever felt that you don’t even deserve to quit? That you’re such a disappointment that you don’t even deserve the glory of conquering self injury? That’s basically how I felt. Am I really wasting my time and everyone elses if I don’t even believe in myself? Everyday I think of the people that are trying to get me through this. Aren’t they being hurt more when I give them hope in me quitting and then rip it all away and cave in again? Why is it that there are people that would give the world for me and I can’t even stop hurting myself for them?..
Maybe I’m just not meant to quit…
I know exactly how you feel, Haley.
It’s almost as if it’s so stupid to do it in the first place, and you have all these things that make you want to do it, a bunch of people upset with you because you are doing it, and then people telling you that it’s stupid, and why should you get to quit anyways? If it is that dumb and you are doing it, do you even deserve it?
The answer is, YES. You DO deserve to quit. Everyone deserves a chance at recovery. You owe it to yourself, your family, and to God to quit. No one really deserves the grace of God but we ask for it anways because that is what we need to keep going. You may not think you deserve recovery, but that is what you need! Keep going, I promise it will be worth it.
Taylor
been there! when i would cave again i didn’t know what my friends would think. they were disappointed in me but they still loved me. and your not wasting their time. they can help you. and it did hurt then when i would cave. ok so i have been both. the friend and the self injury person. when my friend caved it hurt. yes i’m a little disappointed but i’m not mad. i’m happy that she told me. and you are meant to quit.it will take some guts but you can do it. it will hut and be hard but i know that if you put your mind to it you can do it. its rough. it is still rough for me at times and it has been a little over a year. but i had to keep on reminding my self that i can’t do it and if i do i will have to start the year all over again. part of it is self motivation. you have to tell your self that you can do it. and then do it. all it takes is that first step. when you want to just go and do some thing else. call a friend! they would be happy to help. most real friends would love to stay up till 2 talking if you need it. but rely on your friends some. thats what they are there for….