where do i start when i feel like im falling apart for no good reason. i dont have cancer or a terminal disease, but i feel like its all coming to an end. I just changed schools and i have no friends. i cant see my old friends cause i cant drive, my mum wont let me get my license. i dont have a phone so i cant call or text people. i hadn’t S.I in months but i started again. i hate myself for it but i so badly want more. i want to cry but i cant let it out because what if i cant stop. i thought about it for the first time. what if i just gave up….
i feel like im so ugly every bit of me. inside and out. I don’t sleep well anyway. ive had way worse. ive been abused by every guy in my life. dad boyfriends where all physical my brother was just verbal. but it still hurts. i just feel so alone and i dont have anything to live for. i have never quit anything and i feel like im quiting life. i want to love something and for something/one to love be back. i cant stand the quiet and noise make me want to scream. i kno none of this makes sense and tomorrow i will have to go back to school and pretend to all my peers and the adults that im just another happy normal girl. im just to stressed to think. or even try to make anything better, i just dont kno how.