I’m having a really had time today. Its been 3+ years since I’ve self harmed, but I still struggle with urges. Usually when I’m under a lot of stress and /or in pain. I really don’t hare anyone to talk to about this today which is making it ever horde to deal with. In 5 months I will have to move out of my apartment and find a place to stay for 2 months while I wait for housing assistens. Cause I will be starting my own Taxidermy business this summer, if I move out of where I an and find a new apartment. Also my best friend is having heart surgery and its a 50/ so shot if she will live through it. My health hasn’t been very good latly including my thyroid wich is very high. Even though I’m struggling to not self harm its getting hade and harder. I use the items in my happy Box, but they sometimes don’t work. I’m always looking for new Ideas to add to my happy box but right now its not working and I can’t get a hold of my therapist. I can’t trust the doctors at our local hospital ever though they have a mental health word. All they do is slam meds down you and lock you up in the ward.