I’m sitting here tonight just thinking about what do I think I’m doing.  I’ve already told people I know that this year is not going to be a different than any other year I will still be where I am when it’s all over.  I keep having these constant thoughts about how a friend of mine keeps reminding of how she’s moved into a condo and got a new job.  I live in a rat trap which she knows about and tells me that I could something about it which is easy for her to say she’s not living on Social Security Disability.  As time goes by all I could do is hear her say it’s my fault that I’m in this mess and each time I hear it I just feel less and less of things and wondering if that’s the reason why I can’t get out of this circle I’m going around in.  I’ve totally run out of things to look forward to matter-of-fact I’ve lost all hope.  Does anyone have any suggestion you can leave them here or e-mail @ denny666@verizon.net  Thanks