I would like to first say hello to everyone.

Im pretty new to this site and im really looking for support.

I’ve been a self mutilator for three or four years now and I had actually thought for a moment that i might have recovered but here I am again falling back into this vicious cycle. I would love to say I really knew where this all started. Maybe it was from daddy leaving when I was reallly young or maybe it was momsubdueing herself with pain pills or maybe it was all genetics, who knows. Im pretty sure its say to say im a bit misunderstood by those around me but we all are a little bit misunderstood sometimes.

I guess looking for a safe alternative is really the first ounce of control ive taken in my life in awhile. I mean if its not self injuring i know theres a slew of other ways to harm and Im pretty positive ive done them all. Im not too sure what I want out of life anymore if its control or an escape from the madness i am engulfed in. I just wish that I could find one person other than my shrink who understands me and actually cares about what I may have to say so please anyone feel free to try to contact me.  I would love some support.