Hi. I’m kinda new to this site, I just feel like no one in my life is willing to talk about this. It’s all just so hushed up in my family, I’m afraid to ask questions or to say how I really feel. I just can’t deal with how I’ve been feeling this past year and a half, and I keep trying to get help, and it just never works out. I’m on a new medication and yet I want to SI all the time. I’m meeting with the psychiatrist again next week to switch it, and on the phone he’s talking about amping up the dosage or combining stuff and it freaks me out, because my friends think I’m weak to do this and my parents are so oblivious, they think I’m just fine, and if I said I’m not they’d freak out and I’m beginning to lose faith in this process. Does it normally take long to find the right meds? Will they make me stop wanting to SI?
Medication alone is not the answer for everyone. Medication AND therapy and or other forms of support usually have the best outcome. Medication will not STOP (per se) anything, rather it can help reduce urges and help change your brain chemistry behind some of your behaviors. But to answer your question, yes… it does take time (often many weeks and or months) to find the right type of medication and correct dosage. Even then, medication might not be enough ALONE to help.
I have tried medication in the past and went through counseling the first time I was on it. The medication never produced the desired result, yet the counseling helped. I tried medication another couple of times (twice in college, once post college — as I’m 26 now) and neither time worked. When I was in college, the medications they put me on made me very ill and I was pulled off them immediately. I have always had trouble with side effects, making me even more mentally unstable because I had trouble dealing with the physical effects of the medication. I have tried probably a dozen different medications over the last 10 yrs and I have promised myself to never go back to them WITHOUT trying other treatments in conjuction (such as therapy/ counseling, short-term hospitalization, group therapy/ 12 step programs, etc…).
One thing that helped me get through the ups and downs of medication was to be able to talk about how the meds were making me feel with my counselor at the time. She was then able to work with my psychiatrist and help get medication adjusted so I could function better.
Are you also in counseling? Do you have any areas of support? I understand how difficult it is to talk to our parents about self-injury. Is there anyone else you can talk to about what you are going through – maybe a trusted adult friend, pastor, counselor/ therapist, or teacher? You don’t deserve to be alone and you are not alone in what you are going through.
I’ve been in therapy for about a year, but it hasn’t helped. I don’t feel like it’s getting me anywhere. I had just put a lot of hope in the medication. Thanks for your reply. I don’t feel comfortable talking to people in my life about this, and it really helps to hear how other people deal with it.