Right now I am going through the thought phase of my life, I have suffered a couple of loss of people in my life and I don’t know how to grieve.  My feelings say that I angry and hurtful.  I can’t accept that 2 major male figures have died in my life at this time.  I don’t want to reach out to anyone for help.  I am internalizing everything I do.  Do I really feel “safe”  with my friends and/or family because right now I feel deserted?  On the outside I show that everything is okay but on the inside I scared and all alone, I’m afraid to tell people how I feel , I don’t want to bother their space. I feel as if I now stand outside the circle of safety.  Therapy has had its draw backs because I think the therapist wants me to feel these new feeling that its okay to lose consequently I feel like I’m at a loss.  I need to be in a group where my feeling can be challenged , also with my therapy, but the poor therapist cannot read my mind,  I just have trouble putting out the real emotions which are bottled up and confused inside of me.  I need to get some help to change, especially where the lines seem so blurred.