i went to my counseling appt last WED and it didnt go well. Usually when i have something bothering me I always have the therapist talk about stuff so that way i can think of a good way to start telling how I feel. well i never got a chance to tell her. i tried asking (passivly) if i could stay longer but then i starting thinking that she wouldnt care what i had to say or judge me or something. so i changed my mind. Then i couldnt think of when to schedule my next appt…I couldnt think at all. I just told her i would email or call her. well i went to my car and i was so upset at myself that i SI. I felt like that was my last session…i dont want to have to call or email her to schedule an appt…because then i feel needy…and i dont want to be like that.- but i do need someone to talk to. so i emailed her later and scheduled an appt for 3 weeks later. anyways, i decided to email her and tell her what i wanted to say earlier. i told her i felt really sad the past week or two and kept thinking about dying and that i was going through the motions of writing letters and thinking about how the funeral would be. I havent heard anything back from her and now i really feel like no one cares. I thought counselors were suppose to talk to you about that stuff? anyways, i just disappointed and sad….i cant focus on my school work and i’m spending money i dont have….i’m makign things worse for myself…