I’ve been wrestling with this for day and I can’t really get off this train of thought. I have no idea why after graduating the program and telling my therapist that somehow Texas changed me for the better so that I wouldn’t go back to SIing that I am doing it. You see Texas did something for me that New York has never done it’s made me a more focus person and someone who know exactly what she want. New York has done the opposite matter of fact everything that ever matter to me I don’t care about anymore. I learned in the program that we all have a choice and right now every time I think about that choice it escapes my mind it’s like one minute it’s there and the next it never existed. I’m not confused about that i have a choice, but when I think of it it’s not there for too long and then I just give up. Could someone let me know if I’m making sense at at all it’s so hard to decide if I am or not. I keep thinking not only do I think I’m back to square one, but I also I feel my therapist and psychiatrist may think the same thing and that maybe Texas was all for nothing.
Denise-
you absolutely make sense!!
just because you relapsed doesnt mean that Texas was all for nothing. and you havent given up because you are here posting and getting out how you are feeling-that is not giving up.. there are a lot of bumps in the road toward healing but they are what make us stronger-even if you relapse-try logging to get out how you are feeling or write to me if you would like my email is cassandrakirwan@yahoo.com
keep your chin up!
Cassie