i’m so completly overwhelmed and don’t have any idea how to handle this feeling of total and complete helplessness. besides self injuring anyway and i know i can’t do that but my whole body is screaming for it. i know this will pass but that doesn’t help in the moment when its all you can do to just sit still. i feel like i’m going to completely lose my mind and it hasn’t even been a week since i last did it. i feel like a complete failure and that i should be able to come up with something else to do but i just can’t. i feel like its just inevitalbe that even if i can push it off for tonight that one of these days i’ll just end up doing it anyway. its amazing how things can turn from okay to not okay so fast. i don’t know how to handle feelings like this besides SI’ing. Nothing works like it does and its frustrating to find a replacement while i’m working on the real issue.