I ended up SI’ing a few days ago, it was all just becoming too much to handle. I felt horrible for SI’ing after I did it….. but I couldn’t help but to do so…. I just needed to. I know that I need to stop, but it’s really hard to. I did it because the loss of my grandfather always gets to me, September 11th made 4 years of him being gone. It always hit me bad, but it’s never hit me bad enough for me to hurt myself because of. After I SI’ed I felt ashamed, like I let my grandpa down…. I know that he wouldn’t like it if he knew that I did such things to myself. I just need help, but have no way of getting it right now, and I can’t talk to my parents about it because they will just get upset and yell at me about it, which will only makes things worse. I need someone to talk to….