I’m really feeling depressed today and I can’t believe I’ve only been home for a few days and already I’m back to the same routine.  Every time I think of getting out of the house for any amount of time it scares me.  Right now the depression I’m feeling is the same I felt before going to S.A.F.E Alternatives last month.  I get get out of my head that why didn’t anybody realize that I was such a loser and that being where I am (Living in the place where the abuse happen) just pulls me down to the point where I can’t get up.  Alright I completed the program, but that doesn’t change coming back to New York and still being here.  No matter what kind of a program I go to I always come out a loser.  I’m afraid to go out and I’m afraid to stay in you see when you’ve isolated for as long as I have you honestly don’t know anything else in your life.  I don’t know if I would even be worth helping so I’ll leave my e-mail address anyway: denny666@verizon.net