blah! that’s all i ever hear anymore.  who is she to come into y life and get in my face like this? “if you never wanted to see me again why didn’t you just say so?” believe me, i told you! i told you over and over again to let it go. i’ve let you go. i told you the minute i handed you that letter  that that was it, that i was finished with you! that last year of sleepless nights, the drinking, the self-injury. you’re getting married! you said that it was the “thrill of the chase,” that nothing would have ever happened between us, that i don’t know what i want. really? then why did you say that night in the rain that if i wasn’t so  depressed and you weren’t taken you would date me? who are you! i want you out of my life for good. i wish i had never met you! i wish i had never spent those hours in the library talking to you, that i never spent those nights walking around the campus, or gone to wal-mart for a late night food run. i hate you! when i die, don’t come to my funeral. don’t waste your tears. i don’t want you anymore. don’t you get that? you say i don’t know what i want. you know what? i hope that when it all goes to hell, i’ll see you walking around, that look in your eye, dull/dead/empty, trying to find something to fill that void in your life, don’t look at me for any sympathy. and lastly, if you ever see me in public, don’t expect for me to act all nice and coy, and expect for me to act like i’ve known you, cause i don’t