i feel like i should be giving up here. everything. my sobriety, giving up on my break from si, a hope that i can find someone that i can love and call my own, and lastly, my life. i have gone through four therapists in two years, the meds i’ve been taking aren’t doing anything, my doc sits there and stares at me, doesn’t seem to care what is going on with me, but would rather talk about crap that isn’t important. i feel like i’ve let everyone down. my family most importantly, and my friends. i often wonder if this is all really worth it, my life. there have been countless times where i wish i had died instead of my baby sister. i don’t deserve this life. i’ve hurt my mom and dad more times than i can remember. why shouldn’t i just give up? i’ve got the means to end it all.
okay i dnt no u nor ur name or hold ru. but let me tell u something im sorry 4 ur pain my name is amber im 19 years old ive let my friends family down. who lived two years my real family is crap they treated me like dirt so i dnt consider them my family anyways if they love u thsy will always be there no matter what u do. dnt kill ur self ur nt just huring ur self ur hurting them evertime u injure ur self ur hurting them to. ive try kill myself for times last time its been three weeks i was unconcies but survied i was mad but im working on wanting to live i havent injured in two weeks but i injured myself lastnight i got so angry and upsset but anywayz the point im trying to make is if u dnt succed u will be nut house and u will be in cousling 4 longer okay talk therpist or even ur parents heck call me if u need someone to talk to ive been there in sucidal moments but i want give num on blog i dnt want everyone calling me so email me first at crazygurl916889@yahoo.com but oh yah even if u do suced u will have hurt ur family even more if im trying u can try to. try one more thang before u make life decsion i no i said alot probally annoying but i no alot bout this first hand email me in then call me. i still have days where i want die but all bout tt monment geting past im nt pefect but i know alot and im really trying. please try for ur family email me please.