Hi there, I wanted to say, I’m almost 40 and I injure myself – have done it since I was about 15 or so. I hadn’t done so for a really long time but last year I started again, so I thought about why. When I was 15 I got date raped and lost my virginity to that f***er. He stuck around for a couple more dates (I couldn’t admit to myself that I’d been done wrong) and then he split. Found myself injuring. Eventually a couple years later I quit it. Fast forward to age 39. I’d been married for almost 10 years. I got divorced at around 33 and then last year dated this guy who turned out to be a complete a**hole and I felt like every time we had sex he was like the dissatisfied customer of a prostitute, and I found myself injuring. I broke up with him eventually but still a year later I’m still injuring. It’s not too severe. I don’t even know I’m doing it most times. As an adult it’s quite distressing, I thought I’d grown out of it in high school but here I’m doing it again. I dunno, I’d like to quit this cause it’s ugly and I’m sure it looks stupid if I’m out and subconsciously injuring public. I want you all to know it isn’t just kids that have this problem, and I struggle with it as a “grownup”. I managed to quit for a month or two a few months ago and then started again last week or the week before. It’s basically just trying to stop in real time, every minute you find yourself doing it. I don’t know what else to say, except I read once that female prisoners tend to injure. It’s an expression of frustration with life. I have other possible outlets for my stress. I dunno why it seems to take this path. Oh well, pray for me.
I will definitely be praying for you. Stay strong. I know how hard it is to stop but it is possible. I hadnt injured for over two years. I stayed safe but then i started back in and have struggled with SI for five years. But now i realize i dont have reasons to SI despite i have depression and get frustrated at times but i know that my body is a temple of the Lord and that i need to keep it scar free even though i have scars from the past but to not make new ones b/c i am special to God and the people who care about me. If you ever need someone to talk to im here everday my email is lilfinepug64@yahoo.com i also have aim i can give you my screenname if you want. Stay strong and try to not hurt yourself you can win this battle.
Liz